Good

Yesterday I listened Vangelis Voices. It had a deep emotional impact on me.
For about 3 songs I was conciously feeling the bad feeling that I had for a
couple of days and then came the happy tune and I was smiling. I slept like a
baby and today I finally felt GOOD. So it was not a chemical problem, because I have endorphins pumping in me now. The problem was an emotional imprint. It's like you have to clear out all the negative emotions that are locked inside you (kinda like Dianetics).
I decided also yesterday to approach 10 people and ask some crap. I did it today. I was maybe at square one but the recovery process is faster. I can't do courage based on past experiences, you
make courage at every moment and you have to deal with it in the NOW. You
don't have to remember past experiences, they help you perform unconciously
which is great. I am very relaxed when talking to strangers. The technqiue
from my previous post works, the purpose is very important. There are just 2 problems:
I feel that not all people are worth approaching. I really believed that until I found it is a limiting belief. I can't judge people based on looks and besides filtering people out doesn't help me in any way, I have to learn to deal with everyone.
Second problem: I feel the need to act out what I asked. Like when I ask for the bus, after that I pretend to be really interested. Bullshit I only wanted to ask the person, fuck what he/she thinks about me asking!