Power is built on failures.
I went out with my girl for dinner. I can't really control my nervousness, I was in a bad mood. It affects my speech patterns and I'm not confident enough to carry on a conversation by myself. All stuff that I think of saying vanishes or when I remember it I say it without any emotion and I speed through it. This is all because I'm not comfortable. I need to plan things in detail. If I lose control I start giving away my power and that directly affects my mood. I need to plan little things that I will do without hesitation, just because.
Here is the revelation of today:
STATE IS CHANGED DIRECTLY BY ACTION ALONE.
I was tired of her talking so I deliberatly made the decision to shutup and just stare blank somewhere else. She was forced to continue the conversation on a different topic. That gave me power and immediately it changed my state to the point where I wanted it to be. Stuff like kissing happens by itself when I am in the mood for it. If I don't really want it I feel resistance and it doesn't feel natural. I must plan the interaction so that it leads to a point where it is natural. Also I must plan little "attacks" which I will do no matter what, just to show power and DO IT.
Friday, September 01, 2006
Long post
I must remind myself that I allow things to happen. It is not me that does things. So make the intention, visualize to act and then LET IT HAPPEN. All comes naturally if I do things this way.
I'm on my path to become more talkative. Here are some key things that naturally talkative people do:
- they love the sound of their own voice
- they have low standards of what they are saying
- they don't seek any reaction from what they are saying
- they speak whatever is on their mind without analyzing
- they tak because they like to, not because they want something or they want to please the other person.
Today I told a long story, about 3 minutes. The act of doing this automatically takes you into the state. It's totally fun, even if the story is not good the telling gets you into a good mood, just seeing any good reactions. So this will be my goal for every meeting. Have 1 or 2 stories to tell, make an intention to tell them without interuption, just tospit it out.
All is well when I have the frame of screening the girl and knowing that I have more options.
My number 1 mistake right now is nervousness. I need to relax. Work-out before a meeting or/and meditate and release all expectations.
Always plan and control the dates. Plan out even the boring ones so you control when it happens and it doesn't occur unexpectantly with you left wondering what went wrong. If you control every interaction you will know what went wrong.
----------------
Carlos Xuma - Dating Black Book
"[...]almost never think about when
you’ll get a date or have sex next, and that’s when you’ll be able to get it more. You only want sex so badly because you aren’t getting it."
Fuck my desires.
"Another part of the Principle of Truth is that what you really want to happen is what
actually happens."
"We almost always mistake wanting something
for wishful thinking, especially when it comes time to do what it takes to get it."
"[...] emotions are only present when you are not acting to realize your worthy goals. These feelings come up as a result of our post-facto analysis, but they are rarely grounded in reality."
Instead of dealing with negative emotions, take action and the emotions will be irrelevant.
Trust? This is a part I want to work on - "Her willingness to risk that you won’t hurt her like other guys have"
"If you consistently do the things that winners do, you will get the same results."
“Jackie, I’ve been nothing but nice to you for the last two weeks, going out with you and
you’re not very open. Before I decide to call this quits, I wanted to tell you that I see your tough act on the outside, and I know that’s a façade. I can see through your smoke screen. Deep
inside, you want to reach out and be appreciated, but you’re afraid to trust. I’d hate for you to miss out on the wonderful opportunities in life, but we might have to stop seeing each other if we can’t get past this.”
"get past this.”
Call women on their behavior with direct language, and you will be amazed at how
powerful the results are, especially if you are able to describe their emotional reaction in a way they have not been able to."
"The more you do the things that unsuccessful people won’t do, the more successful you will be."
"What almost all of our fears boil down to, in essence, is a fear of displeasing others. At
the root of our fears in life, we learned from an early age that we don’t want to get anyone angry with us. It started with our parents, and ever since then, we’ve been a slave to the approval of others."
"Pretend that the world is your party.
Act as if you are the host. Because, in reality, no one else is any more than you."
"What would you dare to do if you knew you could not fail?"
There can be no failures. what would I do if all actions had positive outcomes? I would TAKE ACTION.
"Cultivate the strength to do what you know you need to, and if you do, you’ll win."
Mixed signals:
"Kiss her or hug her, then push her away to do something else."
"Occasionally do things that are out of character, such as choosing a chick
flick to go see, or go to an offbeat restaurant. Defy her expectations."
"Whenever you are talking with a woman (or women), you are flirting."
There are no non-sexual encounters. Train flirting with EVERY WOMAN you meet.
Dates:
"
What you must do is come up with mini-adventures. Your job is to create an interesting
experience that she is interested in joining in with you. Some examples of meetings after the
first rendezvous:
- Games – take her to a miniature golf course, or a pool hall, or an arcade.
- Local Shops – find a strip of unusual stores to take her to. Underground CD
shops are great because they have an interesting culture, plus there is a lot
of stuff to browse through.
- Flea markets, bazaars, or fairs – These are also interesting as they offer
some interesting things to browse and buy.
- Cooking demonstration – there are a lot of stores now that offer cooking
classes or demos.
- Any places with a strange or dramatic background – castles, old houses,
ruins. There was a place near where I lived growing up called White Lady’s
Castle, where a ghost reportedly walked the grounds. Oddly, that’s where
many of the teenagers went to have a little action.
- The Photo Shoot – Get a digital camera (or a real one, if that’s all you have
available) and go out for a little experimental photography. This plays on her
vanity, flattering her and making her feel important and beautiful that you’d
want to have her as a subject. Trust me, you don’t even have to be very good
at taking pictures. (Hell, you don’t even have to have film in the thing.) Just
have fun.
"
"Just say, “I had a great time,” and then leave."
Leave here "A voicemail with a short, open-ended message (“What are you thinking about right
now, as you hear my voice?” Click.) Mystery."
"Jump, and the Net Will Appear"
"You should aim for touching her just a little less than she wants to touch you."
This is what I'm doing, lol.
"the only thing you can control in a relationship is your own thinking and behavior"
"Wait until the mood passes before you do something you may regret.
If it really needs to be said or done, you’ll still want to when you’re in a good mood."
"When in doubt about the possible impact of your actions on a woman, doing nothing is best.
"The one who cares the least controls the relationship."
"On the other hand, when a man doesn’t get any
release for a week or two, he’s much more vigorous and lively. He has more energy to channel."
The ejaculations might be a problem of my recent low energy. But I'm regaining it now.
"find a comfortable balance that gives you the motivation to take action"
Too much restraint causes me too act stupid.
"The opposite of courage isn’t cowardice … it’s conformity."
-------------------
If I feel down, I just don't remember how great I am. Do some activities that will remind you of that best self.
Never make decisions in a bad mood!
About doing work that you don't feel like doing:
Resistance comes from not knowing what you're going to do. Make a detailed plan of what you will do and then just let yourself do it.
I'm on my path to become more talkative. Here are some key things that naturally talkative people do:
- they love the sound of their own voice
- they have low standards of what they are saying
- they don't seek any reaction from what they are saying
- they speak whatever is on their mind without analyzing
- they tak because they like to, not because they want something or they want to please the other person.
Today I told a long story, about 3 minutes. The act of doing this automatically takes you into the state. It's totally fun, even if the story is not good the telling gets you into a good mood, just seeing any good reactions. So this will be my goal for every meeting. Have 1 or 2 stories to tell, make an intention to tell them without interuption, just tospit it out.
All is well when I have the frame of screening the girl and knowing that I have more options.
My number 1 mistake right now is nervousness. I need to relax. Work-out before a meeting or/and meditate and release all expectations.
Always plan and control the dates. Plan out even the boring ones so you control when it happens and it doesn't occur unexpectantly with you left wondering what went wrong. If you control every interaction you will know what went wrong.
----------------
Carlos Xuma - Dating Black Book
"[...]almost never think about when
you’ll get a date or have sex next, and that’s when you’ll be able to get it more. You only want sex so badly because you aren’t getting it."
Fuck my desires.
"Another part of the Principle of Truth is that what you really want to happen is what
actually happens."
"We almost always mistake wanting something
for wishful thinking, especially when it comes time to do what it takes to get it."
"[...] emotions are only present when you are not acting to realize your worthy goals. These feelings come up as a result of our post-facto analysis, but they are rarely grounded in reality."
Instead of dealing with negative emotions, take action and the emotions will be irrelevant.
Trust? This is a part I want to work on - "Her willingness to risk that you won’t hurt her like other guys have"
"If you consistently do the things that winners do, you will get the same results."
“Jackie, I’ve been nothing but nice to you for the last two weeks, going out with you and
you’re not very open. Before I decide to call this quits, I wanted to tell you that I see your tough act on the outside, and I know that’s a façade. I can see through your smoke screen. Deep
inside, you want to reach out and be appreciated, but you’re afraid to trust. I’d hate for you to miss out on the wonderful opportunities in life, but we might have to stop seeing each other if we can’t get past this.”
"get past this.”
Call women on their behavior with direct language, and you will be amazed at how
powerful the results are, especially if you are able to describe their emotional reaction in a way they have not been able to."
"The more you do the things that unsuccessful people won’t do, the more successful you will be."
"What almost all of our fears boil down to, in essence, is a fear of displeasing others. At
the root of our fears in life, we learned from an early age that we don’t want to get anyone angry with us. It started with our parents, and ever since then, we’ve been a slave to the approval of others."
"Pretend that the world is your party.
Act as if you are the host. Because, in reality, no one else is any more than you."
"What would you dare to do if you knew you could not fail?"
There can be no failures. what would I do if all actions had positive outcomes? I would TAKE ACTION.
"Cultivate the strength to do what you know you need to, and if you do, you’ll win."
Mixed signals:
"Kiss her or hug her, then push her away to do something else."
"Occasionally do things that are out of character, such as choosing a chick
flick to go see, or go to an offbeat restaurant. Defy her expectations."
"Whenever you are talking with a woman (or women), you are flirting."
There are no non-sexual encounters. Train flirting with EVERY WOMAN you meet.
Dates:
"
What you must do is come up with mini-adventures. Your job is to create an interesting
experience that she is interested in joining in with you. Some examples of meetings after the
first rendezvous:
- Games – take her to a miniature golf course, or a pool hall, or an arcade.
- Local Shops – find a strip of unusual stores to take her to. Underground CD
shops are great because they have an interesting culture, plus there is a lot
of stuff to browse through.
- Flea markets, bazaars, or fairs – These are also interesting as they offer
some interesting things to browse and buy.
- Cooking demonstration – there are a lot of stores now that offer cooking
classes or demos.
- Any places with a strange or dramatic background – castles, old houses,
ruins. There was a place near where I lived growing up called White Lady’s
Castle, where a ghost reportedly walked the grounds. Oddly, that’s where
many of the teenagers went to have a little action.
- The Photo Shoot – Get a digital camera (or a real one, if that’s all you have
available) and go out for a little experimental photography. This plays on her
vanity, flattering her and making her feel important and beautiful that you’d
want to have her as a subject. Trust me, you don’t even have to be very good
at taking pictures. (Hell, you don’t even have to have film in the thing.) Just
have fun.
"
"Just say, “I had a great time,” and then leave."
Leave here "A voicemail with a short, open-ended message (“What are you thinking about right
now, as you hear my voice?” Click.) Mystery."
"Jump, and the Net Will Appear"
"You should aim for touching her just a little less than she wants to touch you."
This is what I'm doing, lol.
"the only thing you can control in a relationship is your own thinking and behavior"
"Wait until the mood passes before you do something you may regret.
If it really needs to be said or done, you’ll still want to when you’re in a good mood."
"When in doubt about the possible impact of your actions on a woman, doing nothing is best.
"The one who cares the least controls the relationship."
"On the other hand, when a man doesn’t get any
release for a week or two, he’s much more vigorous and lively. He has more energy to channel."
The ejaculations might be a problem of my recent low energy. But I'm regaining it now.
"find a comfortable balance that gives you the motivation to take action"
Too much restraint causes me too act stupid.
"The opposite of courage isn’t cowardice … it’s conformity."
-------------------
If I feel down, I just don't remember how great I am. Do some activities that will remind you of that best self.
Never make decisions in a bad mood!
About doing work that you don't feel like doing:
Resistance comes from not knowing what you're going to do. Make a detailed plan of what you will do and then just let yourself do it.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Doyle
PJE: "every fear I had of failure or imperfection was linked back to that one emotion of despair and hopelessness. It was that feeling that I always feared, not the actual consequences of a wrong choice!"
I will track down this fear of the emotion using doyle technique (Speed Trace).
Speed Trace:
Very unresourceful states of helplessness, hopelessness, worthlessness, powerlessness, and self-judgment make good candidates.
I want to track down the state of feeling hopeless while talking to someone.
How to do a Speed Trace
Verbal method only: get the explorer's age. For our example, we'll use an age of 42 years.
Have the explorer access and hold the state. You can anchor it kinesthetically (touch or self anchor). If the state has an eye access, have the explorer fix their eyes on it.
Age-regress from the current age.
Synesthesia method
Have the explorer create a representation in at least two senses of moving backward through time. Do this very rapidly, so they reach the age of conception in a few seconds.
Occasionally the person may need to go far past conception to get the whole doyle. Go to the Stone Age, or to the beginning of the universe if necessary. When the feeling of the doyle disappears completely, they're done. Make sure they got the whole doyle (step 4).
Check by trying to re-access the original state. If some of it remains, anchor that and do another Speed Trace. Strong states may get built by "stacking" several doyles, which you may need to Speed Trace separately.
---------------------------
Juggler:
Advanced Storytelling
It is pretty easy to tell a good story when the tale is exciting or unusual. To make it to the
next level though, Juggler encourages us to make the most mundane things sound
interesting. You know you are good when you can make doing laundry sound exciting. Try
this exercise. Every day before you go to sleep, write a short story about your day. Just one
paragraph that captures the highlights and try to make it sound interesting. Make each day
of your life into a fascinating tale and share it with others.
Even on your off days when you feel crappy, talk about these feelings in an artful way. In
short, be genuine and at the same time infectious with your wit. Talk to strangers every day for practice and you will see what material works and what doesn't. Ask people how was their day/weekend and it provides an excellent opener for you to weave some story magic!
BE FUCKIN PASSIONATE ABOUT EVERYTHING -> EMOTIONS!
Make statements not questions.
I will track down this fear of the emotion using doyle technique (Speed Trace).
Speed Trace:
Very unresourceful states of helplessness, hopelessness, worthlessness, powerlessness, and self-judgment make good candidates.
I want to track down the state of feeling hopeless while talking to someone.
How to do a Speed Trace
Verbal method only: get the explorer's age. For our example, we'll use an age of 42 years.
Have the explorer access and hold the state. You can anchor it kinesthetically (touch or self anchor). If the state has an eye access, have the explorer fix their eyes on it.
Age-regress from the current age.
Synesthesia method
Have the explorer create a representation in at least two senses of moving backward through time. Do this very rapidly, so they reach the age of conception in a few seconds.
Occasionally the person may need to go far past conception to get the whole doyle. Go to the Stone Age, or to the beginning of the universe if necessary. When the feeling of the doyle disappears completely, they're done. Make sure they got the whole doyle (step 4).
Check by trying to re-access the original state. If some of it remains, anchor that and do another Speed Trace. Strong states may get built by "stacking" several doyles, which you may need to Speed Trace separately.
---------------------------
Juggler:
Advanced Storytelling
It is pretty easy to tell a good story when the tale is exciting or unusual. To make it to the
next level though, Juggler encourages us to make the most mundane things sound
interesting. You know you are good when you can make doing laundry sound exciting. Try
this exercise. Every day before you go to sleep, write a short story about your day. Just one
paragraph that captures the highlights and try to make it sound interesting. Make each day
of your life into a fascinating tale and share it with others.
Even on your off days when you feel crappy, talk about these feelings in an artful way. In
short, be genuine and at the same time infectious with your wit. Talk to strangers every day for practice and you will see what material works and what doesn't. Ask people how was their day/weekend and it provides an excellent opener for you to weave some story magic!
BE FUCKIN PASSIONATE ABOUT EVERYTHING -> EMOTIONS!
Make statements not questions.
Monday, August 21, 2006
How I feel
Here some important notes from meeting with my girl:
Always lead the conversation to where YOU want to GO!
Start rewarding physically on high points of conversation. Reward even more.
Dominate physically.
Don't think you need to talk, kiss etc. it is nothing. Everything flows naturally if you don't care. ALWAYS BE IN THE MOMENT.
"I like" is a great conversation starter.
Let her plan the date and then reward her for setting everything up.
Talking more is my goal. I can do anything and she'll feel mor comfortable if I just flow. Not necessarily about myself but generally just speak, monologues. I see this in other couples. When the guy is talking she feels free to do anything with him.
Don't think (ever!) about getting something from her. Always show that you have the power and you can give it to her if she is good.
If everything is set up and planned in my head it just flow and everything is natural and effortless. Never TRY to do ANYTHING.
When I touch and she stops all movement, it is because she is feeling me not because she doesn't want it. I do the same when she touches me.
I project states to her. It is always in me. If I am bored, she will be. I must break the state and dominate the situation to change my state. It is most important, how I FEEL.
Always lead the conversation to where YOU want to GO!
Start rewarding physically on high points of conversation. Reward even more.
Dominate physically.
Don't think you need to talk, kiss etc. it is nothing. Everything flows naturally if you don't care. ALWAYS BE IN THE MOMENT.
"I like" is a great conversation starter.
Let her plan the date and then reward her for setting everything up.
Talking more is my goal. I can do anything and she'll feel mor comfortable if I just flow. Not necessarily about myself but generally just speak, monologues. I see this in other couples. When the guy is talking she feels free to do anything with him.
Don't think (ever!) about getting something from her. Always show that you have the power and you can give it to her if she is good.
If everything is set up and planned in my head it just flow and everything is natural and effortless. Never TRY to do ANYTHING.
When I touch and she stops all movement, it is because she is feeling me not because she doesn't want it. I do the same when she touches me.
I project states to her. It is always in me. If I am bored, she will be. I must break the state and dominate the situation to change my state. It is most important, how I FEEL.
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Anti-slut mechanism
------------------
Bodylanguage 101:
Change physiology to change emotions / frame of mind.
cold read:
"You remind me of me a couple years ago. You're a creative person, but you don't have a creative job."
----------------------------------------
I'm trying to physically escalate the relationship. She gives me a hard time on this. This is obviously an anti-slut mechanism. She is terrified that I'll think she's a slut, she's doing it well, however it might become frustrating. I must keep the image of physical relationship in my head at all times.
My method for physical escalation:
- Take it or leave attitude.
- Trust the gut.
- I need to show that I know what I am doing. Move her around and grab her confidently, even if it won't get a good response. Show not that you are desperate and need her body but only that you know that it can happen if she is good enough.
- Be a MAN! Do manly things, do action things, do it YOUR way, ALWAYS.
Bodylanguage 101:
Change physiology to change emotions / frame of mind.
cold read:
"You remind me of me a couple years ago. You're a creative person, but you don't have a creative job."
----------------------------------------
I'm trying to physically escalate the relationship. She gives me a hard time on this. This is obviously an anti-slut mechanism. She is terrified that I'll think she's a slut, she's doing it well, however it might become frustrating. I must keep the image of physical relationship in my head at all times.
My method for physical escalation:
- Take it or leave attitude.
- Trust the gut.
- I need to show that I know what I am doing. Move her around and grab her confidently, even if it won't get a good response. Show not that you are desperate and need her body but only that you know that it can happen if she is good enough.
- Be a MAN! Do manly things, do action things, do it YOUR way, ALWAYS.
Sunday, August 13, 2006
Visualize to act
First date with the girl went fantastic. I had a really hard time planning the logistics and was very mad. In the end all went great because:
1. I stopped worrying because problems dissapear by themselves
2. Nothing can go wrong if you decide what you want to do.
(Realize that you are the creative force in the world and only if you do not control the situation something might go wrong. You create the universe and if you do something wrong you know how to fix it. Always lead.)
3. I planned every detail of the date by visualizing what will happen, everything was 100% as I wanted it to be.
1. I stopped worrying because problems dissapear by themselves
2. Nothing can go wrong if you decide what you want to do.
(Realize that you are the creative force in the world and only if you do not control the situation something might go wrong. You create the universe and if you do something wrong you know how to fix it. Always lead.)
3. I planned every detail of the date by visualizing what will happen, everything was 100% as I wanted it to be.
Friday, August 11, 2006
Being in the moment
10 days ago I went to a club and did nothing.
Now I'm back after a trip and did everything right. This is some time I will remember so I'm not gonna write a lot.
I got my first grind, cuddling, kissing, holding etc. Of course it was nothing once I got it, the whole process was simply a blast. The tactics between me and this girl were incredible. Once we saw each other I knew it was on. I didn't really do anything until she started attracting me. The best way to get the girl is to let her chase you. I implemented Tao of Steve with profound accuracy. It was incredible how this stuff works. The only problem I had was my own psychology.
I discovered the 2 day cycle, which means that one day I am hyper-productive and accomplish my goals and the next day I really do crap and feel needy. PJE has a solution for this and I think I discovered the fix for this on my own. As always neediness is the enemy. I think if you could eliminate neediness there would be no problems in social life whatsoever. As for now it is very important to be in the moment and realize that you are the man and you control this life. From this mind set everything works. When I got a bad day I had to conciouscly refocus on this mindset. How can I have this mindset all the time?
I discovered I am the alpha-male. I can gain rapport with people within minutes or seconds. Everybody loved me. The problem is later on because I don't talk too much. This will be my goal for the next year probably, to become talkative.
I have proved the power of intention. However it is not what I thought it was and what all the self-help gurus talk about. It is exactly how PJE describes it in "Being the body". I imagined the girl that I wanted in a position I wanted her to be. I felt what it is like when she is kissing me. I made the decision, that yes this is what I want. I did this excerice once or twice a day and I got the result.
Also, I am nearly 100% sure that all action comes from learning by seeing others. Especially near, you. So the most important thing in life to do if you want to get girls is surround yourself with guys that get them. The other thing is fix your psychology.
There is a terrible disassociation between expecting something to happen and being in control and knowing what will happen because of you.
Oh and I did my first cold approach on an attractive waitress. It was a mess but I got the guts to do it thanks to all the confidence I got.
All this was done from a learning-frame. I didn't ever have high expectancies. But I doubt this can be a method, maybe the learning-frame is just something that happens in the right time.
----------
DYD Sex. com.
"How to argue and win everytime"
Demonstrate the power of knowing how to give pleasure. Don't ever try to get sth from her.
Never focus on the needs of the seller. Focus on the needs of the buyer!
Think about what they think of you!
"A person will only do something they've already seen themselves doing their mind FIRST"
Don't try to be liked!
All this happens automatically if you are just in the moment and feel what is happening.
Now I'm back after a trip and did everything right. This is some time I will remember so I'm not gonna write a lot.
I got my first grind, cuddling, kissing, holding etc. Of course it was nothing once I got it, the whole process was simply a blast. The tactics between me and this girl were incredible. Once we saw each other I knew it was on. I didn't really do anything until she started attracting me. The best way to get the girl is to let her chase you. I implemented Tao of Steve with profound accuracy. It was incredible how this stuff works. The only problem I had was my own psychology.
I discovered the 2 day cycle, which means that one day I am hyper-productive and accomplish my goals and the next day I really do crap and feel needy. PJE has a solution for this and I think I discovered the fix for this on my own. As always neediness is the enemy. I think if you could eliminate neediness there would be no problems in social life whatsoever. As for now it is very important to be in the moment and realize that you are the man and you control this life. From this mind set everything works. When I got a bad day I had to conciouscly refocus on this mindset. How can I have this mindset all the time?
I discovered I am the alpha-male. I can gain rapport with people within minutes or seconds. Everybody loved me. The problem is later on because I don't talk too much. This will be my goal for the next year probably, to become talkative.
I have proved the power of intention. However it is not what I thought it was and what all the self-help gurus talk about. It is exactly how PJE describes it in "Being the body". I imagined the girl that I wanted in a position I wanted her to be. I felt what it is like when she is kissing me. I made the decision, that yes this is what I want. I did this excerice once or twice a day and I got the result.
Also, I am nearly 100% sure that all action comes from learning by seeing others. Especially near, you. So the most important thing in life to do if you want to get girls is surround yourself with guys that get them. The other thing is fix your psychology.
There is a terrible disassociation between expecting something to happen and being in control and knowing what will happen because of you.
Oh and I did my first cold approach on an attractive waitress. It was a mess but I got the guts to do it thanks to all the confidence I got.
All this was done from a learning-frame. I didn't ever have high expectancies. But I doubt this can be a method, maybe the learning-frame is just something that happens in the right time.
----------
DYD Sex. com.
"How to argue and win everytime"
Demonstrate the power of knowing how to give pleasure. Don't ever try to get sth from her.
Never focus on the needs of the seller. Focus on the needs of the buyer!
Think about what they think of you!
"A person will only do something they've already seen themselves doing their mind FIRST"
Don't try to be liked!
All this happens automatically if you are just in the moment and feel what is happening.
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Fill the cup
The Secret:
"Whatever it is you are feeling
is a perfect reflection
of what is in the processs
of becoming"
"1. Ask
2. Answer
3. Receive"
Be in perfect alignment with what you want through emotions: joy, passion, hope, faith.
ACT when the opportunity is there. That's all YOU have to do.
If you have INSPIRED THOUGHT ACT upon it.
"What you resist, persists" Carl Jung
-------------------------------------
Tao of Jeet Kune Do:
"Can you look at a situation without naming it? Naming it, making it a word, causes fear"
"Approach Jeet Kune Do with the idea of mastering the will. Forget about winning and losing; forget about pride and pain."
"The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or in defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment."
While training keep an open mind. When you engage in combat be extremely calm, do it as if nothing critical is happening. Nothing changes in your behaviour.
EMPTY THE CUP, SO THAT IT CAN BE FILLED AGAIN.
"The enemy is not the other, the enemy is you..."
"Whatever it is you are feeling
is a perfect reflection
of what is in the processs
of becoming"
"1. Ask
2. Answer
3. Receive"
Be in perfect alignment with what you want through emotions: joy, passion, hope, faith.
ACT when the opportunity is there. That's all YOU have to do.
If you have INSPIRED THOUGHT ACT upon it.
"What you resist, persists" Carl Jung
-------------------------------------
Tao of Jeet Kune Do:
"Can you look at a situation without naming it? Naming it, making it a word, causes fear"
"Approach Jeet Kune Do with the idea of mastering the will. Forget about winning and losing; forget about pride and pain."
"The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or in defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment."
While training keep an open mind. When you engage in combat be extremely calm, do it as if nothing critical is happening. Nothing changes in your behaviour.
EMPTY THE CUP, SO THAT IT CAN BE FILLED AGAIN.
"The enemy is not the other, the enemy is you..."
Monday, July 24, 2006
All is in me
I went out yesterday. I felt OK but I chose not to do the approaches, there was a faggy reason for it but OK. I got it planned on Monday.
Here's some material to prove my point from the preious post:
"Instead of working on CONFIDENCE, try working on CONTROL. Find what it is in your life that you are NOT in CONTROL of, and fix it. When you see that girl, realze that if you are NOT IN CONTROL, that perfect women could be gone forever."
"When you lack flow, you CLING to this dream… “Im not ready for this yet.. My confidence is too low. I must wait and later this will be easy.”
But its just a dream. Flow doesnt come from a thing inside you. Inner game/confidence doesnt exist. Flow comes from actions alone.
Next time you feel insecure, you will remember what I told you:
-you lack nothing inside you. You are FINE.
-all you lack is a little FLOW and this is perfectly normal and OK.
-flow comes from actions alone.
"
Enough... reading has to end for this. I will do it now. That's all. All in me.
---
"Getting blown-out is FUN!"
This is the attitude I want for this. It will bring more emotional experiences.
Here's some material to prove my point from the preious post:
"Instead of working on CONFIDENCE, try working on CONTROL. Find what it is in your life that you are NOT in CONTROL of, and fix it. When you see that girl, realze that if you are NOT IN CONTROL, that perfect women could be gone forever."
"When you lack flow, you CLING to this dream… “Im not ready for this yet.. My confidence is too low. I must wait and later this will be easy.”
But its just a dream. Flow doesnt come from a thing inside you. Inner game/confidence doesnt exist. Flow comes from actions alone.
Next time you feel insecure, you will remember what I told you:
-you lack nothing inside you. You are FINE.
-all you lack is a little FLOW and this is perfectly normal and OK.
-flow comes from actions alone.
"
Enough... reading has to end for this. I will do it now. That's all. All in me.
---
"Getting blown-out is FUN!"
This is the attitude I want for this. It will bring more emotional experiences.
Saturday, July 22, 2006
The equation
This is my solution:
This is my only option. I now see how great men achieve everything. All is in the ability to control the body. Because any sort of fear or resistance is just a biological state. The conscious is there to nevermind it. All these months I have been resisting to do this, but deeply inside I always knew that I will just have to do it myself and it won't be pleasant.
I have the final equation for doing something that is out of your comfort zone:
WILL TO ACCEPT THE DOWNSIDE + FATE THAT THE ACTION WILL BRING GOOD
Learning to Desensitize…..
"[...] Having gone through this highly negative experience, you are not in a hurry to repeat it and you may go as far as never approaching strangers. This is quite natural; all of us don’t like negative experiences. What my Grand Master has us do with his technique was to repeat such an experience until we were able to control the physiological reaction.
Some people call this ability to control your physiological reaction “Becoming Desensitized.” This is actually a misnomer, because you do not stop “feeling or sensing.” What you have actually done is learned to control the negative feelings you got from the physiological reaction. This is how the technique was executed:
[...]
You set an approach target of say 10 attempts, then head out to the field to carry out the approaches. As you make each approach, your buddy records your
actions from his perspective, and then after you are done with your approach
you record your details. Try to record what were you feeling, the thoughts that went through your head and what you saw the approach target do or reaction. He had us do this for a straight week (7days.)
I don’t endorse alcohol use, but back then in the first two days, I took a couple of shots of tequila to numb down the pain, after those two days I didn’t need the tequila.
I had GrassHopper go through the technique and got excellent results, now he doesn’t hesitate to make his approaches.I asked my Grand Master what was the logic behind his technique? He said that every time you have a new experience you form a new pattern in your brain. Depending on the nature of the experience, the impact on the body can be a mild or extreme physiological reaction. If the experience was an extremely pleasurable one, you will want to repeat it, if it was negative, you wouldn’t want to repeat it.
By learning to master your physiological reactions, you become master of your body. This in turn gives you the ability to dictate your success.
Remember: Practice, practice, practice!Practice is the foundation of our mastery and makes us fertile ground for our success.
-Sapiens
"
-------------------
I used this over the telephone the today, here are my results:
I wanted to ask how to cook something.
1 - it was a restaurant I put down the phone immediately
2 - it sounded like an old dude and I got intimidated
3 - a nice woman, I wasn't very smooth but I asked and got a laugh. Cool!
I will see how does telling rehearsed lines work, in a robot fashion. Also I
need to remember about the vacuum. It is critical on the phone.
This is my only option. I now see how great men achieve everything. All is in the ability to control the body. Because any sort of fear or resistance is just a biological state. The conscious is there to nevermind it. All these months I have been resisting to do this, but deeply inside I always knew that I will just have to do it myself and it won't be pleasant.
I have the final equation for doing something that is out of your comfort zone:
WILL TO ACCEPT THE DOWNSIDE + FATE THAT THE ACTION WILL BRING GOOD
Learning to Desensitize…..
"[...] Having gone through this highly negative experience, you are not in a hurry to repeat it and you may go as far as never approaching strangers. This is quite natural; all of us don’t like negative experiences. What my Grand Master has us do with his technique was to repeat such an experience until we were able to control the physiological reaction.
Some people call this ability to control your physiological reaction “Becoming Desensitized.” This is actually a misnomer, because you do not stop “feeling or sensing.” What you have actually done is learned to control the negative feelings you got from the physiological reaction. This is how the technique was executed:
[...]
You set an approach target of say 10 attempts, then head out to the field to carry out the approaches. As you make each approach, your buddy records your
actions from his perspective, and then after you are done with your approach
you record your details. Try to record what were you feeling, the thoughts that went through your head and what you saw the approach target do or reaction. He had us do this for a straight week (7days.)
I don’t endorse alcohol use, but back then in the first two days, I took a couple of shots of tequila to numb down the pain, after those two days I didn’t need the tequila.
I had GrassHopper go through the technique and got excellent results, now he doesn’t hesitate to make his approaches.I asked my Grand Master what was the logic behind his technique? He said that every time you have a new experience you form a new pattern in your brain. Depending on the nature of the experience, the impact on the body can be a mild or extreme physiological reaction. If the experience was an extremely pleasurable one, you will want to repeat it, if it was negative, you wouldn’t want to repeat it.
By learning to master your physiological reactions, you become master of your body. This in turn gives you the ability to dictate your success.
Remember: Practice, practice, practice!Practice is the foundation of our mastery and makes us fertile ground for our success.
-Sapiens
"
-------------------
I used this over the telephone the today, here are my results:
I wanted to ask how to cook something.
1 - it was a restaurant I put down the phone immediately
2 - it sounded like an old dude and I got intimidated
3 - a nice woman, I wasn't very smooth but I asked and got a laugh. Cool!
I will see how does telling rehearsed lines work, in a robot fashion. Also I
need to remember about the vacuum. It is critical on the phone.
Friday, July 21, 2006
I must do it
I decided to do 5 approaches today. I didn't do them. I didn't really feel like it, but that is an excuse. I really don't have to be in any state to do it. I just have to do it, no matter what. I have to make a decision to approach NO MATTER WHAT. Then and only then it will be a decision that will be fulfilled. I must be willing to accept any downside, upside, way and state I can be, could be or would be in.
I feel pretty down today, a LONG time ago I felt like this. The reason is because there are girls everywhere in my environment and I don't do anything. Why is my mind beating myself for it, isn't he the one that does things?
Maybe not. I thought today that I and ONLY I can approach. I must do it MYSELF. Letting HIM do it is only a way of not doing it. A method of escaping the real problem. The problem is just me. I've got to JUST DO IT.
I feel pretty down today, a LONG time ago I felt like this. The reason is because there are girls everywhere in my environment and I don't do anything. Why is my mind beating myself for it, isn't he the one that does things?
Maybe not. I thought today that I and ONLY I can approach. I must do it MYSELF. Letting HIM do it is only a way of not doing it. A method of escaping the real problem. The problem is just me. I've got to JUST DO IT.
Solution
I think I have the shyness broken down. I have a WAY of dealing with it. Today I really realized I have a different problem with girls. I feel now really comfortable around them and I can look at them and stuff but... it doesn't make any sense to do it because... I'm not really interested in them.
To explain this state better I want to say that: I am attracted to them, I see their beauty and sexiness, I even see them with me having a good time, I even feel confident about my ability to get them but... I even am horny in the last 2 days, like hell... but... I just don't approach them because I don't have a real reason for it? Why is that?
I hope to get an answer for this and deal with. I might meditate about it today. It might be because I have never really felt the pleasure of being with a woman, it is all imaginative so my brain doesn't really associate a girl with pleasure. So a solution to this might be to force myself to do an approach and see how great it is. Or...
To explain this state better I want to say that: I am attracted to them, I see their beauty and sexiness, I even see them with me having a good time, I even feel confident about my ability to get them but... I even am horny in the last 2 days, like hell... but... I just don't approach them because I don't have a real reason for it? Why is that?
I hope to get an answer for this and deal with. I might meditate about it today. It might be because I have never really felt the pleasure of being with a woman, it is all imaginative so my brain doesn't really associate a girl with pleasure. So a solution to this might be to force myself to do an approach and see how great it is. Or...
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