This is something that applies to pick-ups and to this journal:
If you want something to be perfect you will never get it done.
Today I felt pretty much as well as yesterday. My mind was very clear today. I listened to Piccus and Hypnotycas tapes yesterday. I feel like I'm refactoring all day, especially in my sleep. I don't remember my dreams but I feel change.
Today I discovered a new self-improvement method. I will write more about it as I develop it in practice but the basic idea is: If you want to change the outcome change your behaviour. If you say "you are going" to do something you are lying, because if you are the same as you were in that future moment you are going to do the exact same thing. So I'm out right now not focusing on talking to people, although I would like to, but changing the behaviour I do when around people. I am training myself at approaching people, looking at them, smiling. Acting as if I were to talk to them.
I was standing on the bus stop today, doing the above when a girl walked by. I looked her straight in the eyes then I watched her shoes moving. I saw with the corner of the eye a smile. I KNEW it was on. She went by a little, I could see a faint smile from the back and side of her. After a while she returned just to pass next to me. She got the courage to look at me and I looked but I got nervous and didn't really sustain the eye contact much. I knew this is it (both-ways-attraction), I literally felt my balls shrinking. I think I felt this once or twice in my life. Well this was a pretty new experience so I didn't really do anything. I realized shortly after that I really need to chunk everything down. Right now I'm at the point of looking in the eyes and projecting that I am attracted. All my life I've been avoiding the feeling of being a stalker of showing my interest. This is such bullshit. I don't even know what will happen if I show interest because I have never done it before in my life, even if I had it was a long time ago and it has no relevance whatsoever to the present. The refactoring story continues...
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Power
I've been doing more Sedona yesterday. Today I've been feeling VERY powerful. I don't think I ever felt this confident. I think it's the excercies that I'm doing everyday (including morning). I've been chatting up girls on myspace also yesterday. Also I'm using AR. AR is GREAT for being strong but it doesn't help break comfort zones. Today on the bus I realized I have no skills with starting a conversation with a girl sitting next to me. I feel confident about my presence and appearance and all but I have no real clue what to do. I will dedicate my time to start conversations with strangers. 1 convo each day. I must get good at this and it will be fun.
Monday, May 29, 2006
Sedona
RICK:
I If you do something with enough authority you can get away with anything
Whoever has the stronger frame dominates.
On-line - oppinion on pictures
----
Yesterday at night I made a audio session with Sedona Method. A few days back I programmed
myself twice with Hypnotica and Steve Piccus Sedona tape.
I went out today to buy some books. I was testing Awareness Radius. Well it works. Not as I would want it to but it does. What it does is removes all social phobias. I give a shit about what people think. The problem is I don't engage them, I don't move other people into my AR bubble. I'm sure it will work but still I need to do it. I will be refactoring myself today and we'll see what happens next. I was working out and running in the past days, it works great for my posture I need to make it a habit.
I'm commited to test out one thing, one opener, that is all I want to do for the next weeks.
I If you do something with enough authority you can get away with anything
Whoever has the stronger frame dominates.
On-line - oppinion on pictures
----
Yesterday at night I made a audio session with Sedona Method. A few days back I programmed
myself twice with Hypnotica and Steve Piccus Sedona tape.
I went out today to buy some books. I was testing Awareness Radius. Well it works. Not as I would want it to but it does. What it does is removes all social phobias. I give a shit about what people think. The problem is I don't engage them, I don't move other people into my AR bubble. I'm sure it will work but still I need to do it. I will be refactoring myself today and we'll see what happens next. I was working out and running in the past days, it works great for my posture I need to make it a habit.
I'm commited to test out one thing, one opener, that is all I want to do for the next weeks.
Saturday, May 27, 2006
Psycho-cybernetics
"Law of Reversed Effort": "When the will and the imagination are in conflict, the imagination invariably wins the day."
When I'm in a social gathering and I catch myself thinking hard what to say or measuring the effect of what I will say - I must let go.
Psycho-cybernetics:
FIVE RULES FOR FREEING YOUR CREATIVE MACHINERY
1. "Do your worrying before you place your bet, not after the wheel starts turning."
2. Form the habit of consciously responding to the present moment.
3. Try to do only one thing at a time.
4. Sleep on it.
5. Relax while you work. .
4)
"In sleep, the
creative mechanism has an ideal opportunity to work independently
of conscious interference, if you have previously
started the wheels turning."
5) Remember the relaxation in social environments when feeling tense.
Emotions are the language between you and your brain. Language, thoughts are just data. Feelings communicate not data. If you get a feeling of knowing your brain knows, not when you get a thought "I know".
--
I have been practicing my "demons". It is astonishing how well this works. One note: the controller demon must know what to do. Without a plan there is chaos. I've written down my tasks for today and I have completed nearly all of them. I put away one task because I made too much progress in the previous ones.
I noticed today that when I'm "feeling" superior to somebody and am comfortable I speak whatever I want to. I don't answer all questions and generally I tell what I want to say not what they want to hear.
When I'm in a social gathering and I catch myself thinking hard what to say or measuring the effect of what I will say - I must let go.
Psycho-cybernetics:
FIVE RULES FOR FREEING YOUR CREATIVE MACHINERY
1. "Do your worrying before you place your bet, not after the wheel starts turning."
2. Form the habit of consciously responding to the present moment.
3. Try to do only one thing at a time.
4. Sleep on it.
5. Relax while you work. .
4)
"In sleep, the
creative mechanism has an ideal opportunity to work independently
of conscious interference, if you have previously
started the wheels turning."
5) Remember the relaxation in social environments when feeling tense.
Emotions are the language between you and your brain. Language, thoughts are just data. Feelings communicate not data. If you get a feeling of knowing your brain knows, not when you get a thought "I know".
--
I have been practicing my "demons". It is astonishing how well this works. One note: the controller demon must know what to do. Without a plan there is chaos. I've written down my tasks for today and I have completed nearly all of them. I put away one task because I made too much progress in the previous ones.
I noticed today that when I'm "feeling" superior to somebody and am comfortable I speak whatever I want to. I don't answer all questions and generally I tell what I want to say not what they want to hear.
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Refactoring
Thank you for that thought – I choose peace (or whatever) instead.
What is game?
Game is being yourself. Period.
Quick summary about conversationsfrom my journal:
The gap between the words : http://djdev.blogspot.com/2006/02/ali-g.html
a) what is important for me
b) what I like
c) I look forward to
d) I find this interesting or funny
trying to consciously think about what to say is an error in thinking
Interview technique: When someone asks you a question answer what you want to communicate to
them, not what they asked for.
There is no such thing as the subconscious. There is a set of subnets each of which can operate
on its own. "You" are there to proccess them all in one place at a serial manner.
----------------------------
I've been feeling very energized today. I started excercising and running regularly as part of the intention-manifestation experiment.
I was refactoring myself the whole day. I was using the Sedona Method. I realized it is a part of all my breakthroughs. But the reason I hadn't habituated my previous thoughts is that I forgot what they were about, only words were left. This is a trap that I must be aware of. I realized all my avoiding habits is really me not focusing on why those emotions are there. I must accept them and provide a positive alternative.
Later on I read about controller "demons". I applied it succesfully. I've been using them really my whole life but now I will consciously apply this system to my social life.
I was also reading Psycho-Cybernetics. My habit is now to imagine myself vividly and richful. Myself as a happy man and while interacting with girls. 30 minutes of commited mind training a day.
Before sleep I will hypnotize myself with Hypnotica & Steve Piccus audio program Sedona Method.
What is game?
Game is being yourself. Period.
Quick summary about conversationsfrom my journal:
The gap between the words : http://djdev.blogspot.com/2006/02/ali-g.html
a) what is important for me
b) what I like
c) I look forward to
d) I find this interesting or funny
trying to consciously think about what to say is an error in thinking
Interview technique: When someone asks you a question answer what you want to communicate to
them, not what they asked for.
There is no such thing as the subconscious. There is a set of subnets each of which can operate
on its own. "You" are there to proccess them all in one place at a serial manner.
----------------------------
I've been feeling very energized today. I started excercising and running regularly as part of the intention-manifestation experiment.
I was refactoring myself the whole day. I was using the Sedona Method. I realized it is a part of all my breakthroughs. But the reason I hadn't habituated my previous thoughts is that I forgot what they were about, only words were left. This is a trap that I must be aware of. I realized all my avoiding habits is really me not focusing on why those emotions are there. I must accept them and provide a positive alternative.
Later on I read about controller "demons". I applied it succesfully. I've been using them really my whole life but now I will consciously apply this system to my social life.
I was also reading Psycho-Cybernetics. My habit is now to imagine myself vividly and richful. Myself as a happy man and while interacting with girls. 30 minutes of commited mind training a day.
Before sleep I will hypnotize myself with Hypnotica & Steve Piccus audio program Sedona Method.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Subnets
This is a session of note writing from dirtsimple.org. I'm feeling wonderful applying this stuff and it does work:
So he then goes on to say that you need to establish "lifelines", which are the signals that indicate when you should come out of the committed state.
provide the self that made the decision with a more-attractive alternative
The brain doesn't create crazy behavioral patterns for no reason; there is always something good that every network was meant to do for us.
you have to be able to convince the self who created the network, before you can change the network. You literally have to go back and identify with yourself as the creator of the behavior you hate, before you can change it, because that's the only way to "dwell in those circuits".
attention and identification, which I cannot emphasize enough. With them, you can do anything, but without them, almost nothing.
if there is a reason, there is no choice
what can I get done right now?
A resolution to change a damaging behavior for the sake of a positive benefit is the most shallow kind of decision and the quickest to collapse in the face of pressure.
We rationalize that "this time" will be different, but it will not be different unless we are different, and we will only be different if we are different in every moment.
This is why shallow resolutions fail; our conscious minds are entirely too flighty and easily distracted to focus on behaving differently in every single moment of every single day. To succeed, we need to get more of our minds involved, by changing the fundamental equations beneath our behaviors.
There's No Such Thing As “Going To” - whenever you say "I'm going to", you're lying
Effective managers can change an organization just by changing what gets measured and how the scores are calculated. When you begin to manage your mind, you'll see that the fractal equations controlling your "organization" are the rules that assign values to outcomes.
-- change the value of the outcome
This is why congruent decisions are absolutely essential to change. You have to be willing to give up whatever goodies you're getting from your "misbehavior" -- either you change the rules such that you no longer value what you used to get, or you change them such that you actually value something else more.
axioms are allowed to override anything, including all your evolutionary programming and short-term pleasure seeking.
decision without reason
no reason = axiom
consider the negative impacts of the change they were contemplating
What are you going to give up by changing? What's the worst thing that can happen? What might it cost you to change?
--I'm trying to predict future behaviour of people. It is fear based, I need to focus on MY emotions to make a decision instead.
emotions create the quickest decisions (fear - pleasure)
1.Envision desirable result(s) (not process! - think meta, not result of talking to 1 girl but being a social person)
2.Experience feelings in direct response to the envisioned result
3.Make a decision to have the result
motivaton --- chunking up
"Solving" the problem of housecleaning is an intellectual exercise that provides detachment from the frustration and ugliness and imperfection of the real-life situation.
Demons - use animal metaphors
Feel doing the action. Consciousness can veto the action.
Imagine destination, feel doing it, blink your eye and go.
Expand self-definition to people you are encountering. Self-definition is fluid.
TOWARDS PLEASURE.
Replace pleasure of comfortness with pleasure of having a fun interaction.
Wen I'm alone I am comfortable and can think of any kind of interaction and be creative and fun about it. When I'm physically near the person I can't do it. The reason is I'm starting to feel empathy. I'm expanding my thinking to the other person. Instead of defeating this empathy, I want to use it for my benefit. Use it for thinking what to talk about and how to relate to the person.
So he then goes on to say that you need to establish "lifelines", which are the signals that indicate when you should come out of the committed state.
provide the self that made the decision with a more-attractive alternative
The brain doesn't create crazy behavioral patterns for no reason; there is always something good that every network was meant to do for us.
you have to be able to convince the self who created the network, before you can change the network. You literally have to go back and identify with yourself as the creator of the behavior you hate, before you can change it, because that's the only way to "dwell in those circuits".
attention and identification, which I cannot emphasize enough. With them, you can do anything, but without them, almost nothing.
if there is a reason, there is no choice
what can I get done right now?
A resolution to change a damaging behavior for the sake of a positive benefit is the most shallow kind of decision and the quickest to collapse in the face of pressure.
We rationalize that "this time" will be different, but it will not be different unless we are different, and we will only be different if we are different in every moment.
This is why shallow resolutions fail; our conscious minds are entirely too flighty and easily distracted to focus on behaving differently in every single moment of every single day. To succeed, we need to get more of our minds involved, by changing the fundamental equations beneath our behaviors.
There's No Such Thing As “Going To” - whenever you say "I'm going to", you're lying
Effective managers can change an organization just by changing what gets measured and how the scores are calculated. When you begin to manage your mind, you'll see that the fractal equations controlling your "organization" are the rules that assign values to outcomes.
-- change the value of the outcome
This is why congruent decisions are absolutely essential to change. You have to be willing to give up whatever goodies you're getting from your "misbehavior" -- either you change the rules such that you no longer value what you used to get, or you change them such that you actually value something else more.
axioms are allowed to override anything, including all your evolutionary programming and short-term pleasure seeking.
decision without reason
no reason = axiom
consider the negative impacts of the change they were contemplating
What are you going to give up by changing? What's the worst thing that can happen? What might it cost you to change?
--I'm trying to predict future behaviour of people. It is fear based, I need to focus on MY emotions to make a decision instead.
emotions create the quickest decisions (fear - pleasure)
1.Envision desirable result(s) (not process! - think meta, not result of talking to 1 girl but being a social person)
2.Experience feelings in direct response to the envisioned result
3.Make a decision to have the result
motivaton --- chunking up
"Solving" the problem of housecleaning is an intellectual exercise that provides detachment from the frustration and ugliness and imperfection of the real-life situation.
Demons - use animal metaphors
Feel doing the action. Consciousness can veto the action.
Imagine destination, feel doing it, blink your eye and go.
Expand self-definition to people you are encountering. Self-definition is fluid.
TOWARDS PLEASURE.
Replace pleasure of comfortness with pleasure of having a fun interaction.
Wen I'm alone I am comfortable and can think of any kind of interaction and be creative and fun about it. When I'm physically near the person I can't do it. The reason is I'm starting to feel empathy. I'm expanding my thinking to the other person. Instead of defeating this empathy, I want to use it for my benefit. Use it for thinking what to talk about and how to relate to the person.
Sunday, May 21, 2006
Bootcamp w3d7
Gentlemen I have failed. I have no more time left. My final count for this week is 5/10. I spent so much time on this, I've really learned a lot, mostly about failures. The main reasons why I couldn't "just do it" was thinking and fear. I've already changed my life. Going out with an intention of approaching is a habit. I have now more motivation then ever and I won't stop doing this, I just failed to meet the bootcamp deadline. I have to get rid of thinking when approaching and that is my goal now. I've read today these lines in "Think and grow rich" by Napoleon Hill:
Quote:
People who fail to accumulate money, without exception, have the habit of reaching decisions, if at all, very slowly, and of changing these decisions quickly and often.
Replace "accumulate money" with "accumulate *****" of course .
So my conclusion:
I'm going to have in mind just one default thing to say. A canned opener. This will be my entire focus for the next weeks. I've seen this work on these forums, for example Pugsley's "Are you single?" thread. This will prevent me from thinking about all the possibilities. It will get rid of thinking and fear.
So if it is possible to stay in this bootcamp I will use this approach for getting rejections.
Quote:
People who fail to accumulate money, without exception, have the habit of reaching decisions, if at all, very slowly, and of changing these decisions quickly and often.
Replace "accumulate money" with "accumulate *****" of course .
So my conclusion:
I'm going to have in mind just one default thing to say. A canned opener. This will be my entire focus for the next weeks. I've seen this work on these forums, for example Pugsley's "Are you single?" thread. This will prevent me from thinking about all the possibilities. It will get rid of thinking and fear.
So if it is possible to stay in this bootcamp I will use this approach for getting rejections.
Bootcamp w3d6
I had a real hard time today. Got 1 mini convo. I feel really bad. I realized EXPECTANCY is my worst enemy. I need to live in the moment. Tomorrow I must do 5 convos to end this task. Here goes nothing.
HB convos: 5/10
HB convos: 5/10
Friday, May 19, 2006
Bootcamp w3d5
Quote:"
I'm afraid I have to be the first 'real' bootcamp drop-out. I've feel feeling like sh!t for the last week. I sleep about twice a much as normal and still wake up exhausted. "
Wow you should of told me earlier, this is how easily you can have more energy -> http://www.energiseforlife.com/tony_...g_exercise.php
Since I started doing this excercise I don't remember being tired. Also minimize stuff you eat. Eat only if you're hungry not because you have a habit of eating at a certain time or place.
My report for today:
I did 2 convos. The first one was pathetic I asked 2 girls for some directions, they seemed to like me but I just spoke to the them for the sake of it. The second one was in a line for a concert. I opened 2 girls, one of them started talking and talking I was so surprised by this that I didn't know what to do. As this was happening a second group of girls approach us and we all start talking and joking and soon I lose control of what's happening and I bail :D. This was so funny because I can never predict what will happen, I'm still in a great mood because of this.
HB convos: 4/10
I'm afraid I have to be the first 'real' bootcamp drop-out. I've feel feeling like sh!t for the last week. I sleep about twice a much as normal and still wake up exhausted. "
Wow you should of told me earlier, this is how easily you can have more energy -> http://www.energiseforlife.com/tony_...g_exercise.php
Since I started doing this excercise I don't remember being tired. Also minimize stuff you eat. Eat only if you're hungry not because you have a habit of eating at a certain time or place.
My report for today:
I did 2 convos. The first one was pathetic I asked 2 girls for some directions, they seemed to like me but I just spoke to the them for the sake of it. The second one was in a line for a concert. I opened 2 girls, one of them started talking and talking I was so surprised by this that I didn't know what to do. As this was happening a second group of girls approach us and we all start talking and joking and soon I lose control of what's happening and I bail :D. This was so funny because I can never predict what will happen, I'm still in a great mood because of this.
HB convos: 4/10
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Bootcamp w3d4
I'm so pissed off. And horny. I'm pissed off and horny. Nothing worse than that LOL.
I got a semiconvo with a really shy girl. I hate talking to these girls, it's frustrating because immediately I take on her frame of mind and I become shy too. Sucks.
Later on I missed out on so many opportunities... I've got a bunch of theory in my head about fear and stuff that I would like to share with you guys but I need to field test it. I can tell you now what doesn't work for sure:
- thinking - if you're doing this you're not taking action
- procrastinating - the more you wait for the perfect moment the more you will think about failure and fear will eat you.
I think the 3 second rule is critical. I would modify it to: if you think about something to say DO IT IMMEDIATELY. If you miss that point stop analyzing and just get out of there (physically and mentally).
Do it then think about it. Not the other way around.
HB convos: 3/10
A fun fact:
Can anybody look at a girl sucking on an ice-cream or eating a banana and not think about a blow-job? Is that even possible??
I got a semiconvo with a really shy girl. I hate talking to these girls, it's frustrating because immediately I take on her frame of mind and I become shy too. Sucks.
Later on I missed out on so many opportunities... I've got a bunch of theory in my head about fear and stuff that I would like to share with you guys but I need to field test it. I can tell you now what doesn't work for sure:
- thinking - if you're doing this you're not taking action
- procrastinating - the more you wait for the perfect moment the more you will think about failure and fear will eat you.
I think the 3 second rule is critical. I would modify it to: if you think about something to say DO IT IMMEDIATELY. If you miss that point stop analyzing and just get out of there (physically and mentally).
Do it then think about it. Not the other way around.
HB convos: 3/10
A fun fact:
Can anybody look at a girl sucking on an ice-cream or eating a banana and not think about a blow-job? Is that even possible??
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Bootcamp w3d3
OK here is my report for today:
I approached about 7-8 chicks today. But I'm counting it as 2 convos because they were in 2 groups. I couldn't talk to 1 girl yesterday and today I approached groups. Am I crazy? Because I really feel comfortable talking to groups? I have no problem with making a fool of myself in front of a group but a single girl terrifies me. Maybe it's because of my stage experience.
Here's a little info on what helped me do the approaches:
First of all I did warmups - 3 short convos with random strangers, about 5 Hi's. Then I couldn't get myself to approach for a long time. So I got angry and decided that I will have the stupidest conversation ever. That got me really motivated (I like to use humour to motivate myself). Then I remembered a technique which helped me succeed today.
The technique is: Focus on the destination.
So if you see a girl and you decide to approach at this moment quickly visualize the destination. The destination is you opening your mouth and saying something to her. That is the only thing that is in your mind and then just observe yourself as you're doing it. It's like throwing a grappling hook at the target and then you just pull yourself using the rope.
convos count: 2/10
I approached about 7-8 chicks today. But I'm counting it as 2 convos because they were in 2 groups. I couldn't talk to 1 girl yesterday and today I approached groups. Am I crazy? Because I really feel comfortable talking to groups? I have no problem with making a fool of myself in front of a group but a single girl terrifies me. Maybe it's because of my stage experience.
Here's a little info on what helped me do the approaches:
First of all I did warmups - 3 short convos with random strangers, about 5 Hi's. Then I couldn't get myself to approach for a long time. So I got angry and decided that I will have the stupidest conversation ever. That got me really motivated (I like to use humour to motivate myself). Then I remembered a technique which helped me succeed today.
The technique is: Focus on the destination.
So if you see a girl and you decide to approach at this moment quickly visualize the destination. The destination is you opening your mouth and saying something to her. That is the only thing that is in your mind and then just observe yourself as you're doing it. It's like throwing a grappling hook at the target and then you just pull yourself using the rope.
convos count: 2/10
Monday, May 15, 2006
Bootcamp w3d1
A part of doing it, a critical part is. You must WANT to do it. You must know what you want and that is only what matters.
To DO IT. You must attain a state of definitness of the thing you are about to do. This manifests itself as a feeling of knowing that this will happen. After this state all messages that arrive to you are simply thoughts that help you complete the goal in the best way possible. How to attain this state?
The subconcious must receive a certain amount of data. Data from the environment, plus wanting someting, plus values and goals = certainty of doing something. The data from the environment is processed based on old neural networks from previous experiences. If they are bad the possibility of attaining this state of knowing is dramatically reduced. What I must do is focus on what triggers the certainty and what prevents from attaining it. Then I can step by step fix the networks.
--------------------
I started the third week of bootcamp today. I'm going to approach girls this week.
Today I felt really laid-back and detached. I had a major meditation session yesterday I found a technique where I seek my place. I observe the observer. That is me. I feel that is the place of absolute freedom. I got everything there.
I was thinking of ways to approach girls. Generally if I am comfortable I can do anything. I didn't do any approaches today but 1 interesting thing happened. I went to a shop and I was gona ask something to start a conversation but I thought: this always fails. Why does it fail? Because I'm not comfortable. So when I went in the shop I was thinking how to make the process comfortable and I just started talking about something else and I even got a loagh from the clerk. Wow. I must shrink my awareness to one thought - HOW DO I MAKE THIS INTERACTION COMOFORTABLE?
This combined with the stf I wrote above = APPROACH.
To DO IT. You must attain a state of definitness of the thing you are about to do. This manifests itself as a feeling of knowing that this will happen. After this state all messages that arrive to you are simply thoughts that help you complete the goal in the best way possible. How to attain this state?
The subconcious must receive a certain amount of data. Data from the environment, plus wanting someting, plus values and goals = certainty of doing something. The data from the environment is processed based on old neural networks from previous experiences. If they are bad the possibility of attaining this state of knowing is dramatically reduced. What I must do is focus on what triggers the certainty and what prevents from attaining it. Then I can step by step fix the networks.
--------------------
I started the third week of bootcamp today. I'm going to approach girls this week.
Today I felt really laid-back and detached. I had a major meditation session yesterday I found a technique where I seek my place. I observe the observer. That is me. I feel that is the place of absolute freedom. I got everything there.
I was thinking of ways to approach girls. Generally if I am comfortable I can do anything. I didn't do any approaches today but 1 interesting thing happened. I went to a shop and I was gona ask something to start a conversation but I thought: this always fails. Why does it fail? Because I'm not comfortable. So when I went in the shop I was thinking how to make the process comfortable and I just started talking about something else and I even got a loagh from the clerk. Wow. I must shrink my awareness to one thought - HOW DO I MAKE THIS INTERACTION COMOFORTABLE?
This combined with the stf I wrote above = APPROACH.
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