Exactly one year ago I started this journal. It happened directly after
reading this web page: http://www.shyandfree.com/ and after failing miserably
to interact at a club party.
Time for an evaluation on what milestones I did during this year:
- I have completely refashioned my looks (clothes, hair)
- I gained 22lbs after joining the gym furthering my manly looks
- I got my first number close
- I established a habit of going out and breaking comfort zones
- I got my first girlfriend for 2 months
- I got my first kiss
- I established a habit of improving myself with self-help and seduction
material
- I got my first lap dance
- I became enlightened (I realized the duality of my
nature)
- I made a decision to become a man and follow my dreams
That's pretty much for one year. I predicted back then that it will be just
like my guitar learning. I will need 1 year to achieve results and 2 years to
become good at it. To become a master I will need 5 years. Everything is going smoothly. When you live day to day you see only your struggle, but an evaluation like this is really satisfying. I can't wait to see what the future brings.
A forgotten song by Cat Stevens. Expresses everything I feel at this moment of my life.
Father and Son
Father
It's not time to make a change,
Just relax, take it easy.
You're still young, thats your fault,
Theres so much you have to know.
Find a girl, settle down,
If you want you can marry.
Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy.
I was once like you are now, and I know that its not easy,
To be calm when youve found something going on.
But take your time, think a lot,
Why, think of everything you've got.
For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not.
Son
How can I try to explain, when I do he turns away again.
Its always been the same, same old story.
From the moment I could talk I was ordered to listen.
Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away.
I know I have to go.
Father
It's not time to make a change,
Just sit down, take it slowly.
You're still young, thats your fault,
There's so much you have to go through.
Find a girl, settle down,
If you want you can marry.
Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy.
(son-- away away away, I know I have to
Make this decision alone - no)
Son
All the times that I cried, keeping all the things I knew inside,
It's hard, but it's harder to ignore it.
If they were right, I'd agree, but it's them you know not me.
Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away.
I know I have to go.
(father-- stay stay stay, why must you
go and
Make this decision alone? )
